Consumers Beware! The half empty cola of doom

[Namflow]

So last night I went to the Korona World movie theater here in Fukui, watched a movie, and ordered one of their large colas for what was like 400 or 450yen.

So the girl takes the 'L size' cup, puts it under the soda fountain, pushes the 'fill up L size cup' button and out comes my delicious frothy beverage of choice. Only thing is... the machine stopped filling my cup when it was clearly half empty. No, it wasn't half full, it was very clearly 100% half empty.

So the worker girl there added some ice and the cup was maybe 70% full. I asked her if she could fill it up to the top. She said she hit the button to fill up a L sized cola and that it was preset amount of cola I got with my L sized cup. I told her my cup clearly wasn't full, and that I ordered a large cola because I wanted to drink a large quantity of cola, not a small quantity of cola from a rather large cup.

Some guy working there offered me some explaination I didn't really bother to try to understand. Something about the amount of cola you get in a L size cup is predetermined, and then they add ice, and it's the perfect mixture of ice and cola for your drinking pleasure, along with just the right amount of air at the top of the cup so what little precious cola they did give you won't accidentally spill out.

All attempts at logic such as 'I ordered a large cola because I saw the large cola up on display and I wanted to drink that much cola cause I'm a sugar loving American' didn't work. I also told them there was no point to ordering such a large cup if it wasn't full to the brim with awesome. For some reason they didn't agree... I guess the customer isn't always right here in Japan.

My movie was about to start, and it seemed I wasn't getting through to the two 700yen per hour part time workers. I paid for my large cup that was 70% fill with a mixture of 50% cola and 50% ice and watched my movie. While my cup was not frothing to the brim with delicious flavored sugar water, my soul was frothing to the brim with RAGE. For the gaijin smash has failed, on so simple a task as to get a full cup of cola.

So let this be a lesson to all who dare to listen. Lest not your heart be fooled by the rather large cup on display at the consession stand at the movie theater. Do not fool yourself into thinking, 'Horray! I have finally found an American sized soft drink in Japan! My unyielding thirst shall finally be quenched!' For what awaits you inside your cup is not Pepsi or Coke, but lies, deceit, and empty promises of an unfulfilled dream.

[sekaijin]

i feel you on that man.

i am a no-ice guy myself, as my theory is that if you get a drink so large that it returns to room temperature before you're finished, you probably didn't need that much to drink in the first place.

i remember at TGS a few years back i had the same thing, and i was like "look you dumb bitch, you can just push the cup against that metal thing--drink will pour out. do you want me to do it for you?"

that went over really well.
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[Eric C.]

We'll take you to the Hawaiian burger place out here with American drink sizes next time.
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